I just deleted several paragraphs. What I’d written made it sound like I’m miserable and I’m really not. I’m fairly chirpy, actually. So let’s start again, shall we?
My littlest girl is 15 today. I rang the school and checked she was having a good time. They offered to bring her to the phone but she was in the middle of “having a good time” and I didn’t like to disturb her. Don’t the years go by fast? Sometimes.
I remember when I was 15. It was about that age when I decided that I could overcome being painfully shy by inventing a persona – presenting a mask to the world, if you will. Very few people ever realised this. It’s only very recently that I’ve been able to let him slip quietly away into rehab and take up the reins of my own life again. Like pushing a car downhill, he kind of ran away with me. There are still people who only know me by his name.
Anyhoo, here I am, taking slightly bigger steps every day. When I have a certain hand in mine those steps could be on clouds.
Okay that last sentence may have stepped over the line. If anyone feels nauseous now, I apologise.
Shower. Ovaltine (I know, I know). Bed. Sweet dreams everyone.
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