The Lights In My Eyes

Something unexpected happened to me on Saturday evening. I started to cry.

Not through sadness or loneliness or regret or anything like that. I’m actually hard pushed to put a single word on it.

There’s a park in the city centre called Bishop Lucey Park. It’s been done out as a winter wonderland, filled with lights and grottos, snow machines and people dressed as animals who shake hands and hug children. Santa is there too, of course.

I’d been working on Saturday. Working hard to hit targets and achieve stats. You know how it is. When I got off the bus in the city centre, on my way home, I found a craft fair and food stalls all along Grand Parade. I was delighted – it beat walking home to an empty house. I was browsing through the pretty things at the fair with the scents of burgers and the bustle of the crowds filling my senses when I spotted the lights in the park and thought I’d have a look.

My first thought was “wow, that’s nice” as I approached. The entrance to the park is a big arched gateway and as I walked under the arch and took in the full scene I just knew I wanted to take a picture to show Polly. I pulled my phone out of my pocket and felt a sudden tightening in my throat. My hands fell to my sides and I looked around me again. The air seemed filled with more than just dancing lights and fake snow swirling around frames in reindeer shapes. There was an almost palpable feeling of happiness. My face twisted and I felt tears filling my eyes. This made the lights sparkle even more and intensified the effect. I had to go and stand in a quiet corner of the park for a few minutes while I wept silent tears of wonder.

So what brought that on? Lack of sleep and a long day’s work? Maybe. I prefer to think that I walked slap bang into the Christmas spirit, way before I expected to, that it killed stone dead the last of the cold-hearted cynic within me and the tears were, maybe, of relief that such simple happiness could reach me. I wandered around the park like a man in a daze, with a smile playing around my lips. I shook hands with someone dressed as a giant chipmunk who had just hugged a little girl until she giggled. I tried to take some pictures with trembling hands, which I’ll try to load here too. They didn’t come out very well but that’s not the point. Something important happened to me on Saturday and I’m a better person for it.

So much so that I found myself back there tonight, enjoying the good vibes and the brief company of a very, very pretty lady and her children. And I bought a Christmas tree, more of which another night.