Me 1 Monday 0

I've been sat here for most of the evening listening to the rain rumbling on the roof. After a few days of sunshine, someone has really decided to empty the watering can.

It's been an interesting day. For some reason I've been rather confrontational today. Not with any particular person, nor with people in general - more with the day itself. Quite why I decided that Monday might have it in for me, I don't know and it's certainly not like me to get my retaliation in first but that's how it happened. I got up, kind of launched myself at Monday and grabbed it by the throat.

Whether or not it was necessary, I'm not sure. Whether the day would have turned out any better or worse if I hadn't seen it as an adversary to be overcome, I don't know. It's some distance outside my usual perspective though and took a fair amount of energy to maintain.

So how do I meet Tuesday? Do I stroll up to it with a grin and offer it "five" or do I kick its lily-white ass as soon as I set eyes on it?

*sigh* Life is very confusing.

Event Horizon

So as it's now early Monday morning does this still count as the weekend?

I haven't forgotten about "Twirling" but I seem to have been crowded for time recently. I've been playing a fair amount of chess again, which can easily take up a whole evening if I get the right frame of mind. And of course, I've been spending as much time as possible with my lovely Lady.

Every time we have to go our own ways for a little while it gets a little more difficult. I think that we're getting closer to an Event Horizon; reaching Critical Mass. Every day is a day nearer being together all the time.

And today she bought me the coolest rainbow shoelaces!

Remember me?

Er...hello.

Sorry. It's been ages. And it's very late now.

I have two whole days off work at the weekend, so there'll be something here then, 'kay?

Promise.

Denial

I never have nightmares. Especially not the kind that wake me up in the dead of night, dry-mouthed, heart racing and screams echoing in my head.

So there's no need for me to have turned on the light and to be sat here cuddling a small, fluffy dinosaur, jumping at every car that drives by, flinching at every gust of wind, with the bitterness of unshed tears cluching at my throat with fingers as dry as the grave.

Just sayin'.

Ponderous

Over the years I've grown pretty good at hiding things. Personal things. Like when I've had my feelings hurt. I guess being shy and sensitive (and if anyone laughs I'm leaving) can only be hidden so much.

One person knows very well when there's something wrong. That sentence should probably start "only one person...". I've got very good at bottling stuff up and keeping a "shiny side out". It's the little stuff that creeps through - rudeness in those I wouldn't think it of; thoughtlessness; cliques; people who are the life and soul of the party with most people but make no effort to diguise their disdain for others, without getting to know them.

Of course, a solution to this would be to stop my mind from churning over things again and again. I used to be able to stop it with sizeable amounts of alcohol and the like but I'm getting too old for that shit now. Anything more than about 4 pints is going to leave me fit for absolutely nothing the following morning.

We all have our little psychoses to carry, I guess. Somedays theyre heavier than others. And with sharp edges.

The Sky's The Limit

It' getting kinda late but it struck me that I hadn't been around for a few days.

It's still a little bit up in the air as my manager is on holiday until Thursday but let's just say that the "issue" at work appears to have been sorted out. I needed to nail it and I did. Cometh the hour, cometh the man and all that jazz!

Hopefully things will now start to mellow out a little bit and I can start to properly kick some ass. It's comin', you mothers. Watch me fly...