Vagueness

I tend to fight shy of blogging about work but here I sit blogging from work! I'm not being too much of a bad guy - I am now well outside my working hours and am just hanging around waiting for my lovely Lady and using the company's electricity rather than my own.

I'm not breaking too much of my self-imposed restriction when I say that I'm very excited about tomorrow as I have an interview for an interim post, doing more the sort of thing that I'd like to be doing. I'll keep you posted, albeit in a vague, cryptic manner.

For now, that is all...

And counting...

This won't be a long post as I've got to be up in just over 4 hours to go to work. Stupid boy to be up this late.

I've got to be honest, these 1-day weekends are starting to get a little old. I know that it's my own fault if I choose to work overtime but even so I think it's be nice to have a little time off. I know I've got some holidays coming up soon and it'll just be nice to have a few days off in a row.

That reminds me, I must try to "fine-tune" my holidays a little tomorrow. So I guess I should go to sleep.

Bank Holiday

It's been a Bank Holiday in Ireland today. Coupled with my having a day off work, it's made the day feel very like a Sunday so forgive me if I get confused about days, okay? I don't have a set theme in mind for this post so it might feel like a bunch of bullet point stiched together loosely.

Last week was (I nearly typed "this week has been") a very strange week in lots of ways. There were so many niggles and irritations going on that either my Lady or I were soothing one another's frayed nerves nearly every day. The weather was very hot and sultry too, which didn't make it any easier. I learned (or rediscovered) that even under the kind of stress that was going on I was more than capable of doing my job...and more. This bodes well for the future, more of which in a later entry, I hope.

I've been searching for somewhile for some free calendar software that meets my needs. I'd tried Outlook at home (works reasonably well but is too much or a resource hog - I don't need all those features), Thunderbird, with the "Lightning" calendar add-on (very disappointing - lots of issues with Thunderbird itself), Sunbird (which is effectively a stand-alone version of the aforementioned add-on) which is where I thought I'd settled but I've recently been very happy with the "ReminderFox" add-on for Firefox. I have it installed on Firefox both at home and at work, which is a good sign. I'll keep you posted.

I was supposed to be off work tomorrow as well but agreed to do a day's overtime. It'll help the old bank balance next month and it never hurts to show willing.

July will be a long month, I fear.

So if I'm at work tomorrow, I should go. I don't have to get up as early as I might, thanks to a beautiful lady offering to  pick me up but I do still have to remake the bed before I can climb into it.

Goodnight all.

Me 1 Monday 0

I've been sat here for most of the evening listening to the rain rumbling on the roof. After a few days of sunshine, someone has really decided to empty the watering can.

It's been an interesting day. For some reason I've been rather confrontational today. Not with any particular person, nor with people in general - more with the day itself. Quite why I decided that Monday might have it in for me, I don't know and it's certainly not like me to get my retaliation in first but that's how it happened. I got up, kind of launched myself at Monday and grabbed it by the throat.

Whether or not it was necessary, I'm not sure. Whether the day would have turned out any better or worse if I hadn't seen it as an adversary to be overcome, I don't know. It's some distance outside my usual perspective though and took a fair amount of energy to maintain.

So how do I meet Tuesday? Do I stroll up to it with a grin and offer it "five" or do I kick its lily-white ass as soon as I set eyes on it?

*sigh* Life is very confusing.

Event Horizon

So as it's now early Monday morning does this still count as the weekend?

I haven't forgotten about "Twirling" but I seem to have been crowded for time recently. I've been playing a fair amount of chess again, which can easily take up a whole evening if I get the right frame of mind. And of course, I've been spending as much time as possible with my lovely Lady.

Every time we have to go our own ways for a little while it gets a little more difficult. I think that we're getting closer to an Event Horizon; reaching Critical Mass. Every day is a day nearer being together all the time.

And today she bought me the coolest rainbow shoelaces!

Remember me?

Er...hello.

Sorry. It's been ages. And it's very late now.

I have two whole days off work at the weekend, so there'll be something here then, 'kay?

Promise.

Denial

I never have nightmares. Especially not the kind that wake me up in the dead of night, dry-mouthed, heart racing and screams echoing in my head.

So there's no need for me to have turned on the light and to be sat here cuddling a small, fluffy dinosaur, jumping at every car that drives by, flinching at every gust of wind, with the bitterness of unshed tears cluching at my throat with fingers as dry as the grave.

Just sayin'.

Ponderous

Over the years I've grown pretty good at hiding things. Personal things. Like when I've had my feelings hurt. I guess being shy and sensitive (and if anyone laughs I'm leaving) can only be hidden so much.

One person knows very well when there's something wrong. That sentence should probably start "only one person...". I've got very good at bottling stuff up and keeping a "shiny side out". It's the little stuff that creeps through - rudeness in those I wouldn't think it of; thoughtlessness; cliques; people who are the life and soul of the party with most people but make no effort to diguise their disdain for others, without getting to know them.

Of course, a solution to this would be to stop my mind from churning over things again and again. I used to be able to stop it with sizeable amounts of alcohol and the like but I'm getting too old for that shit now. Anything more than about 4 pints is going to leave me fit for absolutely nothing the following morning.

We all have our little psychoses to carry, I guess. Somedays theyre heavier than others. And with sharp edges.

The Sky's The Limit

It' getting kinda late but it struck me that I hadn't been around for a few days.

It's still a little bit up in the air as my manager is on holiday until Thursday but let's just say that the "issue" at work appears to have been sorted out. I needed to nail it and I did. Cometh the hour, cometh the man and all that jazz!

Hopefully things will now start to mellow out a little bit and I can start to properly kick some ass. It's comin', you mothers. Watch me fly...

Falling stars, shooting stars, seeing stars

I don't really know what I'm doing blogging tonight. There's something that's weighing really heavily on me but I can't mention it here. The only form of self-censorship I impose is about work so lets just say that I might be looking for "other opportunities" soon.

In complete contrast, a certain lovely Lady is doing very well and will be representing her company abroad, for three weeks, in a rather exotic location. I'm so proud of her I may actually burst. Yes, I'll miss her horribly but it's a good thing for her career and I'm sure she'll have a fabulous time. She deserves it.

Closer to home, I just gave my head a terrific crack on an overhang above the stairs. I'm seeing a few stars here so I'm going to close my eyes and see if they go away.

Sir Realism

I'm sat at work, waiting for my Lady. I've played on Facebook as much as I dare, considering it's strictly verboten and I'm kinda bored. I'm also feeling a little sick. This is about 50% being poorly and about 50% the day I've had. Ah well.

So I need to find a way to shake off these Friday blues and remember that I have the company of a beautiful, intelligent woman to look forward to and a day off work tomorrow. I'm not wasting any of this evening or tomorrow being miserable - Sunday will soon roll around and I'll have loads of time for that then.

Line in the Sand

There's a dead giveaway for when I'm under stress - my skin.

For the last three weeks I've been under threat at work. At the age of 44 if I get dismissed for failing to meet targets, for whatever reason, then things are not good. Notice the typical English flair for understatement there? I've ticked all the boxes for the last three weeks while my skin has got gradually drier, I've got steadily spottier and spent more and more time clawing at my hands and arms. 

No more. I am better than that and I have plans. This shit ends.

Because I will have it so.

Changes

Wow, I felt ill last night! As you know, my usual blogging time is last thing at night but there was no way I was going to try to sit up and type last night. I was convinced for a while I was coming down with the 'Flu. I was alternately cold and hot, I was shivery, dizzy, nauseous, the works. This after having a sore throat all day.

After a reasonably good night's sleep, I feel a little better - if forced to quantify it I'd say I'm about 70%, which will do for a Sunday. I'm taking it fairly easy with the housework as I need to well enough for work tomorrow, so I may draw the line at laundry and washing up.

What I do have, which is making me feel a little better, is a new internet connection. Up until now I've been using a pay-as-you-go wireless dongle from 3. It's been...okay. Not terribly quick and little flaky sometimes. I hadn't had any experience of wireless dongles before and didn't know what to expect. When I was last paying my phone bill, one of the guys in the shop tried to sell a dongle on contract. It set me thinking. It'd be added to my monthly phone bill and has a bigger monthly allowance than 3 gave me. They'd give me 14 days to try it out so I thought I'd give it a shot.

I set it up last night and straight away it was quicker. So far so good. If it fails to please you'll hear about it, trust me. I haven't yet tested the speed by trying to stream any video but it handles online radio comfortably. Yay Meteor! Their phone service has it's little quirks but I'm happy with the internet they've sold me.

I saw it, I saw it!

It was few minutes to 8 yesterday morning, I guess, that I thought I saw it. Even in my slightly bleary condition (overslept and had to beg a lift in) something like a four-foot high Cornetto wasn't going to escape my attention.
Me: "That was a four-foot high Cornetto outside the garage!"
Polly: "What?"

There's probably a formal medical term for those whose fevered imagination leads them to hallucinate giant ice-creams (or dream of industrial-sized slabs of pâté, but that's another story). Of course, this isn't the kind of thing one can keep to oneself. I had, shall we say "mixed" reactions to the revelation, ranging from the fervent hope that it was an hallucination because it would be cool to see ice-cream that wasn't really there (working too hard, that one) to people edging nervously in the general direction of away.

By the time the end of the day rolled around I'd almost forgotten about it. Until we stopped at the garage for petrol. Even then I didn't spot it again until we were pulling away...
Me: "There! Look! Cone! STOP THE CAR!!"

It's obscurely comforting to know that it was really there. Now if only I had a real one like that...

Lost

I don't know how well this will format as I'm posting from my phone.

I've a laptop and a netbook in the house and can't make either of them work.

I feel rather lost and a little lonely. Can't wait for the morning.

A Sunny Sunday

I had one full day off at the weekend but travelling into work on Monday morning I felt as though I'd had a week or so off. The end of last week and the weekend were so full, so enjoyable that it felt like a holiday.

It was entirely down to the company I was in and the frame of mind that the company always brings on. Now that things are back to what currently passes for normal I wanted to share a few pictures of Sunday with you all.

We drove to Killarney, in Kerry. It's a beautiful part of a beautiful country. The first time we stopped the car, I got out to see this...

We drove for a while and then stopped for lunch at Muckross House...

...which is very pretty in itself...

After lunch I was taken to Ladies View. I'd heard of this before but didn't expect it to be quite so lovely, even in the early spring with very little green about. It was the second-most beautiful thing I saw all day...

I can't wait to go back again later in the year when everything is green and lush, maybe with a light rain falling.

I honestly had the most wonderful time, in delightful company and the years fell away from me to the extent that I just had to go climbing in the rocks...

...and have been standing on that rainbow ever since.

Guesting

I'm a staying with a friend for a few days. It's a mutually beneficial arrangement - it saves them being alone in their house and I get lifts to and from work, plus the pleasure of their company in their lovely house. I may never want to go back home!

The internet isn't terribly reliable where they live, though. The house isn't in the middle of nowhere but there are certainly signposts to it in the nearest village. hence my doubt in the previous post about the frequency of blogging for the next few days and the fact that I'm typing this at work.

It's been a funny day - the ups and downs haven't been on a far steeper curve than usual, although I must hasten to add that I've remained fairly stoical in the face of all of them. I'm facing the imposters with a steady gaze and asking both of them "WTF?"

And it's nearly time to go...with some remarkably good news to close the day here!

Just so's you know

Even though I have to be up at a quarter to five in the morning, I'm going to wait for the washing machine to finish. I can hear it on the spin cycle so it won't be long.

I wouldn't normally bother but there are some shirts that I want to put on to wash overnight so I can put them on to dry in the morning. Unless there's a last minute change of plans somewhere, I shall be away from the house for a few nights and will need a change or two of clothing.

There may or may not be blogging again before the weekend. There will be smiling and laughter, though.

Woken

It's very wild outside. Raining and extremely windy, if not cold. It's actually kind of nice laid here feeling proof against it all, even if it did wake me up. I don't think I'd been sleeping very heavily but as I'm up again I thought I pop in here as I've been a little remiss over the last few days.

Over the weekend I submitted the last two articles of my original comission of eight. Whether or not it'll go any further than that I don't know. I was notified to day of a short-story writing competition I may have ago at. 3000 words shouldn't be beyond me. It's just finding either something original or a sideways approach to something that's been done before. Hmmm...

What else? I spent Easter Monday in the company of the woman I love, which was very lovely. The whole day was a haze of lazing around and just enjoying each other's company. Magical.

This evening I've watched Transformers on TV, which was rather entertaining and then indulged myself with a couple of new purchases - re-issues of Heaven & Hell and Mob Rules by Black Sabbath. Both terrific albums and far better than anything they released with a certain Mr Osbourne as their "singer". 

And I suppose I should try to get back to sleep now.

Frozen Blossom

First it's snowing then it's sunny. Then it's snowing and then it's sunny again. One may never be 100% certain what's coming next but it's always going to be exhilarating, exciting, beautiful and irresistible.

Allegory? Never heard of it.

Glad of the electric blanket again at the moment. The weather has taken a distinctly chilly turn again and I fear for the blossom on the trees and the young buds. Spring will come again though, as surely as the world turns.